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exploring & coming home

October 6, 2010

On an ingenious whim, my college roomie decided to fly out from NYC for a long weekend to spend some time with me here in the bay area!  Our weekend was packed with adventures in Oakland, San Francisco, Muir Woods and even a frightening near-running-out-of-gas-experience on Highway One.  On the curvy part.  By the cliffs.  In the fog.  In the dark.

After all of the excitement, I realized that sometimes life’s best moments are when I finally return home, put on my PJ’s and curl up on the couch.  But it’s all about balance, and without the exploration I wouldn’t have reveled in the safety and comfort of home.  And without a home to return to, certainly exploration would wear me down.  It goes both ways.

I’ve been thinking about this as a metaphor (I know, so typical of me, hehe) for the process I’ve been going through these past few years since I decided to get healthy & learn to love my body.  It’s not always a straight path, not always a smooth path, and it’s certainly not always the most efficient path.  It’s like a big zig-zag between pushing and safety, and it takes a lot of patience to see that this jagged path does trend in the right direction.

To keep myself feeling safe while I wander off to explore new ways of living and new parts of myself, I strive to always approach this exploration with both curiosity and faith in my solid home base.  This home base is not bad habits.  Home base is space, home base is maintaining the progress you have made without pushing further at that moment.  And the cool part is that we are continuously bolstering our home bases throughout any exploratory growing process!  The farther we have pushed, the better place we are standing in when we stop to catch our breath.

While pushing at other areas of my life and myself, I have been at home base health-wise.  But I find myself yearning for exploration again, and now that my friend is gone (so sad!) I look forward to focusing on GRE studying and working out.  I know it may sound a little wacky, but I do desire both of those things, and the best part is they compliment each other 🙂

So here’s to a week of quiet, wholesome exploration!

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One Comment leave one →
  1. Jody Savage permalink
    October 6, 2010 9:41 pm

    Yikes! Glad the fog-cliffs-no-gas thing worked out OK.
    Lots of love,
    Mom

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